buckling down

Ok.... got on the scale. First time in almost two weeks. Gained less than 2. Would have been much more a few days ago. Luckily I came to my senses and fasted there at the end. I honestly expected much worse, especially since I haven't been able to work out the entire time.

But now it is Feb and I will never ever think staying off the scale will motivate me ever again. Lesson learned.

15 pounds is a lot considering I've been pretty much maintaining the whole last month. But I figure if I regain a bit of self control then it's about time for another drop.

Have a great February darlings.

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Wow...slacker much

I can't believe I haven't posted since Jan 4. I'm terrible. Haven't been on the scale in about a week and a half. Getting on Feb 1. Testing myself to see if maybe pure terror of the unknown will motivate me to behave. Honestly, I doubt I've made much progress if any at all. I did take my measurements the other day and I've lost a bit so hopefully that translates to a loss on the scale. Pure terror is just not the way to go and I will never do it again.

About 15.5 hours into my last fast of the month. Gotta end strong to make up for all the times I've screwed up this month. Not a whole lot one can do with two days left but it's something at least.

Still down for the count exercise wise. My knee is finally down to pain free unless of course I walk around for any length of time. Just glad it's feeling better. I am telling myself over and over that I need to wait before working out because if I reinjure it *again* I will have to go to a doctor and be done for who knows how long. Patience and fasting will get me through this.

February needs to be better.

Day 4: 136

Good morning!

Morning weigh-in: 136 (BMI: 23.34)
Year so far: 3lbs lost, BMI dropped .52
Left to next goal: 8 pounds

Yesterday (SGD 3): 350 in/531 out = -181 calories

Well... this is okay.  I took a bunch of meds for my back and passed out for 12 hours.  Sometimes when I have days like that I gain, sometimes I lose.  And with all the weight loss from the first couple days, I am not stressing much about reaching my goal.  Still, it is annoying.  Plus I don't know if I'll be able to even walk enough today to get in my calorie burn.  My back is less painful this morning but if I move too much it'll fire up again.  Gahhh.  I *should* rest today.  That way I know I'll be back to normal tomorrow.  Rather than screw up today and be in bed after walking only 30 minutes and get stuck in bed tomorrow too.  If only I had avoided the weight gain when I was first having problems.  Then this wouldn't be such an issue. 

Sighhh.  Well I'm not working out this morning anyway.  I'll rest and if around noon I'm still painfree then I'll get a walk in.  I wish my body didn't hate me so much.

Love!
<3 fiend

Day 3: 136.4

Good morning!

Morning weigh-in: 136.4 (BMI: 23.41)
Year so far: 2.6lbs lost, BMI dropped .45
Left to next goal: 8.4 pounds

Yesterday (SGD 2): 300 in/406 out = -106 calories
Woohoo! So I think the weight loss may drop off a bit after today.  The last two days were the end of my cycle and I think it was a lot of bloating and water weight that ended.  But I'm so happy about the start of the year.  The first goal of the year is going quickly! Still not changing my deadline but I don't think I'll have any problem getting there :).  And if I get there before the deadline I'll get to figure out new dates for future goals.  I do so love planning and list making hehe.

I'm not feeling too lightheaded right now so I'm hoping the 550 calorie burn I'm about to do doesn't cause me a problem.  Yesterday afternoon I couldn't walk around the house without feeling unsteady.  I refuse, utterly refuse to pass out.  I'm not low enough yet to be forced into giving this up.  And there is no way that me passing out will go unnoticed.  Especially with all my health issues.  My doctors would freak out and my parents would be insanely worried.  If I feel like I'm going to fall over during my workout, I will stop.  But I pray that doesn't happen.  I'm only walking so I should be fine. 

Keep going loves,
<3 fiend

Day 2:137.4

Good morning loves!!!

Morning weigh-in: 137.4 (BMI: 23.58)
Year so far: 1.6lbs lost, BMI dropped .28
Left to next goal: 9.4 pounds

Yesterday (SGD 1): 400 in/518 out = -118 calories

I'm over the moon right now =).  I did *not* expect to lose 1.6 pounds the first day of the year.  Especially since I barely managed to stay within SGD Day 1.  Going to walk again soon.  Aiming for 400 calories burned.  I'm scaling my calories burned with my intake plans for the time being.  May go for longer if I'm in that workout zone and don't want to stop.  But so long as I get 400 out then I will feel sort of alright about eating 300 throughout the day. 

So now I have 20 days to lose less than 10 pounds.  I'm not going to change my goal 1 deadline regardless of the progress I make in the next few days.  Just in case I hit a plateau.  One can't expect this big a loss every day.  One can hope though hehe.  This is just a great start to the new year! I was so incredibly motivated on new year's eve and to see that motivation bring massive results was rewarding.  I have even more motivation to behave today :).

Hope the new year continues well for you,
<3 fiend

Day 1: 139.0

Morning loves!!! Happy New Year!!!

Soooo there's my official first weigh in of 2011.  139 pounds.  BMI: 23.86. (I'm 5'4"). Disgusting I know. 

Next goal: 128 (BMI: 21.99)  Deadline: January 21. 

Yesterday's fasting and 2.5 hour walk resulted in a .8 loss so yay for that! I was kinda hoping for a one pound loss but I will take what I get. 

Today is also the first day of yet another attempt at SGD.  I honestly don't know if I intend to finish it but I wanted something structured to start the year.  Especially since I've been fasting/binging and not much else the last two weeks or so.  That means a 400 calorie intake but I'm aiming for 300-350.  Already burned 518 according to my cardio trainer app so yay for that. 

Uploaded my spreadsheet for 2011 to Google Docs.  It will track weight, BMI, intake/burn and measurements.  I may share it if anyone is interested but I will def be posting overall progress reports at least once a month but maybe more.  I figure if I have to be ultra accountable to alllll the people on blogspot and twitter and tumblr that see these posts, I can't just shrug off laziness and cow-like tendencies. 

I wish you all a very happy 2011 and can't wait to see how far we get together!
<3 fiend

last day of 2010!!!

Morning!!!

Complete and total fasting today.  Wanna start the new year as low as possible.

Finalized New Year's Resolutions:

1. Tweet my weight every morning.  Even if it means seriously disappointing my amazing followers. 
2. Burn at least 1.33x the amount of intake.  Even if it means walking for hours at night because I hurt too much for more. 
3. Fast one day a week. 
4. Maintain my 2011 spreadsheet daily.
5. Finally, obviously, reach my goal weight and post my before/after pics.  (tentative date of April 1)

I am so psyched for the new year.  It cannot be worse emotionally than 2010.  Plus I lost so much in the last part of the year so I am feeling capable.  I just really want to buckle down and get to the point of weight maintenance.  I really pray that I can be happy with my weight at some point.  I hope I am not so screwed up that no number will ever be low enough.  Only way to find out is to just lose and lose and lose and see if one day I wake up happy with my body. 

I wish you all a fabulous end to 2010 and a promising start to 2011.
<3 fiend